unknown/unimportant |
thought |
The Chief |
Herr A |
Herr B |
The Butler |
Earl Dorian Red-Gloria |
Professor Caesar Gabriel |
Bannai |
Lieutenant Colonel Otto Reinhart |
Major Klaus Heinz von dem Eberbach reporting, sir. I always accomplish my mission.
... yes, sir. I'll begin operations immediately.
Herr A, contact London University. I want this Caesar Gabriel to appraise the artworks of the Eberbach collection.
It's for Intel purposes.
Herr B, get a car ready.
This sorry excuse for a man? And why me? Any private could deal with this one. Still, orders are orders.
What is it?
It's a Lamborghini.
I loathe people who own them.
Nothing but shallow, egotistical bastards.
Guests?
Herr B, come with me.
That figures. He's clearly the sort of degenerate that would drive such a car.
Herr B, gather the art on this list. I'm taking them to the embassy in London.
Klaus Heinz von dem Eberbach. I am the head of a family related to the German branch of the Hapsburgs.
That's "Major" to you.
Slime!
Whatever. It's not like I put it together.
Quiet! Can't you see I'm busy?
Come again?
I dont know who you think you are. But the Eberbach collection is considered a part of the cultural heritage of this country.
I will admit it's valuable.
That painting alone is worth a leopard tank.
Naturally. I'm not a spoiled, hedonistic aristocrat who has both time and money to waste.
It's simply mind over matter. And incidentally, I would never wear something as insipid as a red, sleeveless shirt.
You ...
I have no intentions of letting you strip off my uniform.
Where your preferences run is none of my business, but ... But I hate what I hate.
Enough is enough! Everything here is mine! And belive me, I would never sell it to the likes of you no matter how many millions of marks you might flash. Ever!
I find you loathsome to even look at. Get out.
That idiot!
Open all of the windows. Get some frssh air in here. I feel sick.
A uniform, a turn-on? Pearls before a swine? I will not take this lightly, you depraved fool!
We're taking this to London, too. That degenerate might come around while I'm gone.
I will not give him the satisfaction of giving him anything, period!
We'll worry about that after we've looked into his so-called telepathic powers.
I'm Major Klaus Heinz von dem Eberbach. I am the owner of the works to be appraised.
Come this way.
Each and every item from the Eberbach collection is a priceless cultural treasure. This level of security should be expected.
We're here.
How long is it going to take you to appraise them?
There's no rush. But give me a rough idea.
Cough! Cough!
I don't like being taken lightly.
I know that appraising takes tremendous time. Some works take months, even years.
Have you gone mad?
Yes, it's a bona fide Zaizeneggar.
Wait a sec! He said Zaizeneggar, right?
How did you know that it was a Zaizeneggar? There are plenty of painters hwo used the same style.
No. I just need an appraisal.
What are you on about?
All right! You are a guinea pig!
Satisfied?
Shut him up.
Professor Gabriel, please understand that ivestigating your ESP, if you have it that is, is critical for understanding the potential of the human mind. And I need not go into detail about its potential military uses. So simply do the appraising.
Don't bother to lie and pretend you're normal. I'll be able to see right through it.
Do not underestimate me. I'm not a man to be trifled with.
Watching that kid ... What a dull assignment.
Who brought this? What did he look like? You idiot, be more specific!
Useless git!
That degenerate! So, he's made his way here, has he? He isn't going to get away with this!
Only that swine would have the gall to do something this arrogant. Get everything that you can find on Eroica!
Art theft lies outside my jurisdiction -- no wonder I didn't really know about him. But he's good-- very good.
He's nothing but a common crook, yet he had the audacity to waltz right into my home in broad daylight! My home! And he intends to steal my paintings? The nerve of that degenerate!
I hate him even more. I will not give him the satisfaction of taking anything.
I want security boosted to full alert at the embassy! No! Worse! Eroica intends to steal our national treasures!
You know that degenerate? So you do know the Earl!
And just who are you?
Someone call the zoo and have this ape taken away.
I'm Klaus Heinz von dem Eberbach. Of NATO.
I don't have a use for Interpol. Get out.
Inspector Bannai, would you like a cruise missile crammed down you? Or up you?
Just an idiot.
What is your relation to the Earl? Are you part of his gang?
No. You're a valuable guinea pig. I have to keep you safe.
I want NATO troops posted inside and outside the embassy. I want this Eroica caught at any cost.
It's to protect national treasures. Anyone who disagrees will find himself posted in Alaska.
If you wanted this painting, you should have just snuck in and stole it. That would've been almost forgivable. But you had to go out and play the star by warning me first. I detest egotistical flaunts like that. And you knew that.
No one who has earned my hate has survived. You picked the wrong fight. You're mine.
Anything out of the ordinary? Forget about him! He's a loon to start with.
A! B! Are the paintings safe?
What are you idiots doing, napping at a time like this? Wake up! And stay sharp!
It's knockout gas! Nobody breathe the gas! Stay awake! It's Eroica!
Wake ... up ... Wake ... up .. Damn ...
Earl! You ... You ... You degenerate ...
You'd do all this just for a single painting? You're a blasted idiot!
Shut up ... Nobody ... insults me ... I'll ... I'll ... never ... forgive ...
You ... You ... You ... degen ... zzz
The right to be silent, professor?
If you don't want to talk, fine. But we do have ways of making you talk.
Professor, do not trifle with me. I'm in a particularly foul mood today.
I don't share the Earl's tastes, so when I play rough it's going to hurt.
What is it?
What?
Speaking
Oh? You talked about having a "different" set of values. But it's about money in the end, isn't it?
You're right to assume I have him.
Tsk, tsk. No.
Not only have you stolen something valuable from me, but you've also disgraced me to no end. Now it's my turn to take something of yours. And the more you want it the more I will fight you. You'll never get it back.
Good. You're my sworn enemy.
Good. Send a regiment now. I'm taking Caesar to Bonn.
Go ahead. I'll just say that the earl is, in fact, a spy for the other side and that I took you to a secure place for protection. Professor, there's nothing you can do.
Don't blame me. Blame my higher-ups.
A quick escape.
But then again, they're pros. Stay sharp even when we land in Bonn.
They're here to pick you up.
Stop! Stop right there, Colonel!
Take off your hat.
Take it off!
A man shouldn't be embarrassed about being bald.
All you did was attract more attention. If you were my subordinate, you'd be posted in Alaska by now.
What?
Damn!
After them! Don't let them escape!
Damn that degenerate!
After that Lamborghini!
Shut up and get going! Or it's Alaska for you!
Not once, but twice!
He won't get away! Not ever!
If it's your "litte policy" to always get what you want, then it's my little policy to always finish off my enemies. I'll chase you to the ends of Hell.
It's a modified Leopard B-1. It's fully automated so it doesn't need a full crew.
Now, Earl. You're target practice and nothing more.
Think I care? In fact, I feel much better for it.
So you've fled all the way to the shores of the north sea. Impressive, Earl.
It's pointless to flee there.
I've got you now!
No!
Are you going to shoot me?
Don't touch my tank!
Why did you shoot the radio?
But my troops will come looking for me.
Of course it's cold. It's the North sea.
Then put himin my tank. It has a heater. If something happens to him, it's my responsibility.
sigh And you, too. A man shivering in the cold is a pathetic sight.
A tasteless sports car. A sleeveless shirt. Small wonder that I can't stand you.
You idiot! You shot the heater too!
A real man would know a thing or two about machines.
What? Do you want to tear off my uniform and attack me?
That kid is a regular pain in the neck. I really can't fathom what you see in him.
Delicate? He's just a wimp. He has to be toughened up. It's for his own good.
So it did come down to that!
The conversation has come to a stop.
Can't you keep your mind out of the gutter? Think of something normal to talk about.
I loathe those. How about something more uplifting?
Something less serious.
You'll hate it.
Here goes.
Even in a storm. Even in the snow. Even in the smiling face of the sun. Even in the burning day. Even in the freezing night.
Even though our faces are covered in a sandstorm, our esprit de corps is our life.
Our tank rumbles forth in the swift wind.
It's a song that was sung by the German tank crews of World War Two. My father was a tank commander. He used to sing it often.
Sadly, it's the only sort of song I know. Uh-huh.
How should I put it?
You said you like beauty.
Well, to me at least, the color of polished steel is beautiful.
I'm just being stupid, huh?
Sure. This one I know to the third verse.
Our engine roars with the sound of thunder. Our tank is quick as lightning.
Hey! Keep off me! I'm not singing a lullaby.
Let's not get too cozy. I'm still your enemy.
I get nauseous when degenerates like you come on to me.
Yeah right, you degenerate.
I'll have you arrested the second my men get here. You'll never get to talk that sort of rubbish again.
Help is here.
And that's the sound of a NATO chopper. You lose, Earl.
We've got a sick one. Fly to a hospital first, and then ...
You idiot, why didn't you come in a bigger chopper?
Understood. The second he's in one I'm coming back to arrest you.
Take off your coat. Unsubordination will ...
Here. Put this on.
It's because you wore something so effeminate.
Now what?
Make sure a thief doesn't take it, then. Although I doubt anyone would be that interested.
We're almost at a hospital.
That's quite impossible! I left him all alone ... on the island ... with my tank ...
Is that what he's planning? No! He won't, will he? Back to the island, now!
My tank! My leopard!
So he was after the tank! And his men must have been here!
Look around here. It's not as if they can easily take a tank somewhere.
Let me see!
It's the Earl! He's stealing my tank!
After them! You idiot!
That's the painting they stole.
That bastard!
Beaten. Litterly beaten. He's better than I thought. He can even steal a tank.
You're good. Too damned good. But I'm not about to give up either.
If you think of chasing elusive beauty is thriling, then let me tell you, I know that chasing bastards like you is just as good. Don't get caught. Because it's going to be me that brings you in.
Good luck? Because he left me to deal with this wimpy kid?
Hail them back.
No.
Just "GOOD LUCK". sigh.
A tank was stolen, and then they get a report like this? The people upstairs aren't going to be happy about this. But sod them. And what are they going to do? Ship me off to Alaska?
Professor, Interpol has released your friends. They were cleared of all wrong doing.
Are you still looking at that painting?
But he took my tank in its stead.
The tank? The painting? Which is more vluable to me? Come to think of it, I have never looked at it carefully.
Professor, is this painting that exceptional?
The Earl wanted it badly. So it has to be good.
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